"Let My Spouse Handle It" – Are You Setting Them Up?

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"Let my wife (or husband) handle it — I think she (or he) knows what to do."

This is a common response when people are asked who will manage their affairs after they’re gone. Naturally, most turn to their closest next-of-kin — a spouse, an adult child, or perhaps a lifelong friend. These individuals are chosen not only because of proximity and trust, but also because we believe they understand our values and can carry out our last wishes faithfully.

However, this decision is often made without fully understanding the legal responsibilities and complexities involved in estate administration.

Why Lack of Clarity Can Be Dangerous

Many people appoint a legal representative — often called an executor and trustee — without knowing what the role truly entails. It's not just about trust and goodwill; it's about capability, commitment, and a deep sense of duty.

So, what does a legal representative actually do? Let's break it down.

What is an Executor and Trustee?

The terms may sound formal, but the responsibilities are very real.

👨🏻‍🔧 Executor: The Estate Manager

An executor is the person you appoint in your Will to manage and distribute your estate after your death. Think of your estate as a large "asset tank" — everything you've accumulated in your lifetime flows into it. But this tank doesn’t run on autopilot. Someone needs to carry out your instructions, pay off debts, and ensure your assets are passed to your intended beneficiaries. That person is the executor — your “runner” who gets the job done.

🧑🏻‍💻 Trustee: The Estate Caretaker

A trustee, on the other hand, is the individual responsible for holding and managing your assets, often over time, especially when there are minor beneficiaries or long-term trusts involved. This person acts like a meticulous accountant — tracking every cent, ensuring nothing is misused, and acting with the utmost fiduciary responsibility.

In Singapore, it’s common to combine both roles — executor and trustee — into a single person for practicality. Because in reality, it is difficult to determine the close-to-perfect candidate to fulfil these roles. Hence, the Executor and Trustee appointed is expected to carry out his or hers duties with utmost integrity, dedication and impartiality.

However, they can also be assigned separately for added checks and balances, depending on your intentions. Whether to combine the role or to separate the role, it all depends on what is your ultimate objective.

Executor and Trustee Duties: More Than Just a Title

Being an executor or trustee is not a simple task — especially if your estate is complex or your Will includes unclear instructions. Your representative will need to handle legal, financial, and interpersonal challenges, often while managing emotionally charged family dynamics.

✅ Key Responsibilities:

• Arrange funeral and memorial services

• Identify and locate all beneficiaries (especially challenging if they're overseas)

• Engage a lawyer and apply for the Grant of Probate

• Obtain required documents: Death Certificate, Will, and Schedule of Assets

• Open an estate bank account, consolidate funds, and close personal accounts

• Pay all taxes and duties (e.g., income tax, property tax, inheritance tax)

• Settle outstanding debts, such as mortgages or personal loans

• Claim receivables (insurance benefits, legal claims, etc.)

• Notify parties of the intent to distribute assets

• Handle property liquidation or title transfers

• Maintain accurate records of income, expenses, and distributions

• Manage sub-accounts for minor beneficiaries and liaise with guardians
  

🧠 Think about it: If this job were posted on LinkedIn, would you apply? If yes, how much would you expect to be paid?

Yet most executors take on this role without compensation, driven only by familial duty and goodwill.

Choosing the Right Person: Are They Really Ready?

During estate planning consultations, this is the most difficult decision for many clients.

You're not just listing someone in your Will — you're hiring someone for one of the most important jobs of your life.

🧩 Ask yourself:

• Are they emotionally and mentally capable?

• Can they manage family expectations and conflicts?

• Do they understand legal and financial processes?

• Will they be willing — and available — when the time comes?
  

You may be surprised at how few people truly qualify.

💬 Quote Revisited

“Let my wife (husband) handle it — I think she (he) knows what to do.”

But do they?

And even if they’re willing — should they carry this burden during a time of grief, stress, and legal complexity?

💡 Conclusion: Take Care of Them, So They Can Take Care of You

Appointing an executor or trustee isn’t just about naming someone you love — it’s about choosing someone capable. Someone who can rise to the occasion during one of life’s most difficult moments.

And remember: when your family is grieving, burdening them with complex responsibilities can be emotionally and mentally overwhelming.

✅ Choose wisely. Plan ahead. Talk to a professional. Book an appointment with us to find out more!

So choose wisely, plan thoroughly, and most importantly — have open conversations with your loved ones.